The Lusty Mage’s Crash Course in Sex Magick
Perhaps you’ve noticed my frequent references to sexuality, sensuality, and sexiness recently, and it’s got you wondering, what’s up with THAT?
Well, I’ve been amping up the sexy talk because a large part of my own transformational journey over the past several years is a result of exploring my own sexuality again for the first time in decades. And although I haven’t had what I would call a change of orientation, I have been struck by several epiphanies along the way…
Mainly, I had this crazy realization that all sex is magick, and all magick is sex.
Most people readily recognize that sex is magickal and sacred when it results in pregnancy. But on its most basic level, sex is still sacred even when no babies come of it…even when the parties involved are not cis-gendered, heterosexual people…even when the parties involved are just one party (stay tuned—more about non-hetero love and masturbation to come in a later post)…
Sex is always among the most sacred of human acts.
Yes, sometimes sexy playtime opens the portal for a new soul to incarnate; but most times, what we’re really doing is opening ourselves up to be charged, changed, and even challenged. Sex with open hearts creates connection, love, and intimacy; when it’s focused on passion, sex yields creative expression, ecstasy, and inspiration…
Put plainly and simply, sex is marvelous and miraculous.
During the deed, we experience the fleeting sensation of being god-like in our power to create new life. Even when we aren’t seeking or even capable of it, that primal human memory of baby-making still holds sway. In the throes of passion, we also experience la petite mort, or the tiny death, of orgasm—when everything but pleasure and intensity fades away to nothingness. It’s nothing short of holy.
But here in the U.S. (as I’m sure you’ve noticed), sex is traditionally viewed with side eye. We don’t trust it. It’s is something to be feared, shunned, or at the very least, wary of. From a young age, we’re taught certain sexual boundaries and to never question them. Our culture is rife with these messages (and many more):
- Don’t do it outside of marriage.
- Only do it with your spouse.
- Missionary, no toys, and only to get pregnant.
- Once you have kids, your sex life is over.
- Once you’re __ years old, your sex life is over.
- Avoid anything “strange” or “kinky.”
- Sex is dirty, shameful, risky, scandalous, blasphemous, and base.
All of these ideas are incredibly destructive to our ability to freely and openly enjoy this integral part of the human experience. Incidentally or not so incidentally, these oppressive ideas cut us off from a natural way to experience our own power, as well as the wonder and awe of the ineffable. It would seem that the broader social structure has a vested interest in keeping each of us isolated, unplugged, adrift, and unempowered. But I digress…
The fact is, sex is one of the most accessible, yet profound ways that we work magick on this plane.
The controversial iconoclast and occultist Aleister Crowley defined magick as, “the Science and Art of causing Change to occur in conformity with Will.” Sex certainly falls into this category, as it is a scientific (and artistic in the right hands 😉) method by which we generate new life, emotional bonds, pleasure, safety…and oh yeah, orgasms. Sometimes we do it go to sleep, to improve our mood, to feel more alive, or to feel wanted. In short, we set out to make some kind of change in ourselves and/or our lovers with sexual acts, and when we accomplish them, we are performing magick.
So there you can see how all sex causes change and thus is magickal, even when we don’t set out to perform magick.
But how is the reverse true? How is all magick sexual?
Well, to explain that requires a slightly broader conception of sex than just two people fucking. To understand sex in a magickal context, we need to think of it as combining two distinct conditions/entities/forces. Put simply, we perform magick any time we make the two, one.
That is to say, we perform magick when we merge duality (opposites) into a singularity. During sexual acts, we merge the male and female (or active and receptive, to use non-gendered terms) into one entity or result. In fact, thinking of sexual intercourse as a merger is so common that Shakespeare once euphemized it as, “making the beast with two backs.”
But to let you in on a huge little magickal secret, there is really only One, and you and I and everything we know is part of the One.
All dualities are really just multiple facets of the same One: self and other, male and female, light and dark, good and evil, above and below. When we eliminate the seeming contradiction between two conditions, we necessarily merge them into one reality—into one beast, if you will.
Sexual intercourse is just another melding of duality into One, when Force (the masculine or active) and Form (the feminine or receptive) meet to create the whole, The All. This whole (a.k.a. God, YHVH, Elohim, Light, Spirit, Source, etc.), is neither masculine nor feminine, active nor passive—the Divine is All. And we and our lover together become a tiny version of the All when we surrender our singular selves to the meeting of minds, bodies, fluid, breath, and spirit. In that moment of ecstatic merging, we achieve the fundamental magickal decree, “as above, so below,” by becoming a microcosm of the Divine’s macrocosm.
The same is true when we perform other types of magick. Take casting a spell for money, for instance. By doing spell work for money, you are attempting to eliminate the incongruence between having and not having, so that you can feel luxurious at all times, which leads abundance to ‘magickally’ find its way into your luxurious possession.
Because all magick hinges on merging duality into singularity, all magick is inherently sexual.
But beyond the lofty philosophy of the magickal properties of gettin’ it on, sex is fun. It’s hot and tantalizing, exciting and empowering. It’s creative. It’s transformative and transcendent. It’s ENERGY. Generating and directing energy is the main mechanism of magick, and what do you think you’re doing when you’re working on turning yourself and your lover on?
Ultimately, what re-exploring the world of sex has shown me is that we are each capable of moving and influencing a staggering amount of energy through our willingness to engage our unique sexuality.
I’ve seen how increasing my attunement to sexual currents not only electrifies my sex life, but also super-charges my creativity and courage in other ways, including my willingness to share myself with others and be seen. In fact, you’re reading one of those manifestations right this moment.
If you’ve read this far, perhaps you feel stuck, too, like I once did. Perhaps you miss the way you used to enjoy your sex life, or maybe you’re tired of fighting heaviness and boredom in search of creativity and fun. The more familiar this sounds, the more I encourage you to stay tuned for next time, when I’ll share some ways to dip your toes back into the sexy pool…
In the meantime, I’m available to consult with you on YOUR specific situation—let’s pull some cards, let’s dive deep, let’s talk about how we can support you in accessing your power to follow your true purpose. Whether you choose to work with me or not, I encourage you to engage in the sacred work of rekindling your own sexual power. Life is fleeting and precious—please don’t waste it. You have nothing to lose, and so very much to gain.